Boundaries, once set, are important to keep. Set boundaries according to what you are willing to live with and what you can accept. Create options for your teen that you can accept and are willing to abide by. Let your
Some kids have deep emotional wounds we cannot heal. We can, however, validate their experience. We need to let them know that we see them, hear them, agree with them and understand them. This way we let them know that
When we have strong emotional reactions, it is because our core beliefs have been violated. Blaming others is not the answer. We need to take ownership of our feelings. My feelings are not your (the teen’s) responsibility. This understanding creates
Look at it from their perspective. Imagine how they feel and let them talk. Try your best to listen and understand.
White, red and black are colors that are often found in fairy tales. They represent the world, self, and death (wisdom), as well as ways of being in the world.
The words you use are important when it comes time for the consequences discussion. You want to relate what you are willing to do and not do based on the current situation. Hand the problem to the teen and have
If your boundaries are not firm, they are suggestions. As adults, when we set boundaries, we are supposed to mean it. If not we should not have set the boundary. Adults set loving boundaries in loving ways. Another important Love
People tend to have either a single focus or a diffuse awareness when they do things and engage with their surroundings. Understanding which is dominant in your teen can help your relationship.
Parents have to give their teens choices to avoid a power struggle. It is important that parents are good with the choices offered because teens have a way of choosing the option least desirable if given the choice.
It is important to assess the way you feel in any given situation. Ask yourself how you feel when engaging with your teen. Actions do not always have to be the same, but self care does.